This episode, we talk about how depressing our holidays have been while watching movies. And Ben reads from more holiday-themed Twilight fan fiction.

Like any Christmas miracle, I wrap up something I slowly learn to hate just in time for the holidays.

We review an amazing love story between a stegasaurus and a man who can transform into a helicopter.

This book will never end. I thought that it would be a 'fun' and 'quick read'. But nope. Frank Baum has written an epic about Santa Claus that I'm sure entire schools are dedicated to studying the greater meaning of.

We review the story of a young sleuth who uses a mystery as a way to get a free trip to another country.

Claus starts a war between immortals and doesn't even notice because he's too busy thinking about... other people's kids. Then he uses the reindeer's kink against them to break into people's homes and watch them sleep.

Like a trust-fund kid, Claus sets out on his own but his mom takes care of everything for him- even down to making his dinner every night. That leaves a lot of time for him to sit around thinking of... the kids...

Where this author makes up a fake origin story for a real man that died in 1942 during a bombing over France. It's highly offensive, especially since it prominently involves 'grabbing' a 'girdle' for some reason.